THE ART OF UNIMPRESSED

It was a strange feeling. On the one hand it was pleasant, but on the other hand I didn't know what to do with this raise.

Three of us - me, my team leader, and my team leader's team leader - met on a cloudy Monday morning in Meeting Room 4. This meeting room has always had air conditioning problems. It was too hot in summer and too cold in winter (like now). No one has even tried to fix it in the 5 years I have been worked here.

My team leader Tomas looked at me expectantly, waiting for my answer. I froze, not knowing what to say. The pause dragged on, and apparently to ease the tension, Tomas' team leader Mark, a balding man who had recently celebrated his 40th birthday, added

Interesting how I would feel if they actually gave me less. I doubt I'd feel any different than I do now. And I really feel nothing.

Of course, it's nice that they've decided to recognize my importance, and according to industry standards, now is about the right time for a new raise - a year after the last one. But somehow I feel absolutely no enthusiasm, which means there is no need for this raise.

I think if they gave me a gadget - a smart watch or a smart phone - it would feel the same, but cost a lot less.

A fluorescent light flashed above us for a second, making the sound of a fly stuck on flypaper, and then continued to shine on the bald head of Mark, who continued to speak:

The question is not even which number would satisfy me, but which number would make me feel anything at all.

It's funny that only 2 years ago, when I took out a mortgage, I would tear out anyone's throat for a 30% raise.

And before that, when all those games of climbing the junior-middle-senior ladder meant something to me.

I think the feeling of wanting a raise is related to the amount of money a person already has, and a graph of that function looks like a playground slide.

The very first dollar you earn has the highest value, because when you have nothing to eat, that dollar would feel like a treasure. Then the value decreases to the point where a new dollar doesn't matter at all.

But as I move up the ranks or get into long-term debt, the graph becomes flatter and the A point moves to the right.

But in general in the A₂ point I have a good life I would want. Further is a flop where money doesn't matter.

All they could do to get me interested in this raise is offer me a new position where people make more. Or they could tell me that the market is growing and people with similar skills are making more now. In those cases, I would feel the need to increase the compensation.

It feels like not only do they have to increase my salary, but they have to sell me on the idea of that increase. Otherwise, the investment makes absolutely no sense.

An overly hairy person passing by the meeting room looked at Tomas and Mark reproachfully and pointed to his watch, which meant that he would be using the room soon.

Apparently no one expected our meeting to last more than 5 minutes.

But I haven't even said a word about wanting anything. Why did you start this conversation? Maybe you want to motivate me to work harder? But I already do my best. If I try to do more, it would mean that I am going straight to burnout.

Let them dare to ask me to work more. There is no money that can convince me to increase my workload.

Or am I lying to myself? Maybe a certain amount could do it. If they gave me exactly twice as much as I make now, I probably would not resist. But I bet they would not like it if they understood that while I was working like this, I would save all the extra money for a long vacation. And when I'd saved up enough, I'd just quit. That is, I wouldn't be working for a well-fed life, but for a freedom.

From point A to B in my case is about the same amount of money as from 0 to A. From B to C is not so clear, but I think it's about 120 x (0-A). With such a pile of money I can buy my freedom for the next 10 years from the first paycheck.

It's just a fantasy, of course, but the thought is entertaining.

Hmm, that's interesting. I've seen Oliver's code, and I've always wondered why members of his own team didn't throw him off the balcony of the smoking room. He is just a pest. It looks like he writes his code with his feet.

Frankly, this information added significant value to my feelings about the need to raise. Very interesting.

But why would Mark tell me this? I didn't know, and I wasn't worried.

Aha, I get it. He has an inner conflict about this injustice. He understands that Oliver's skills are lower than mine and thinks that he should earn less than me. So this is how Mark resolves this internal conflict. He can't just not give me the raise because it would make him feel uncomfortable. Funny how the market keeps growing because these greedy Olivers keep demanding raise after raise, forcing managers to raise everyone else's pay. Managers are literally trapped because they would either have an internal conflict (like Mark) or they are constantly at risk of losing someone like me if I found out Oliver was making more. I would ask myself, "Why do they value me so little?" and try to find a better place to work.

Relief appeared on the faces of the team leaders. They stood up, pushing away their chairs and extending their hands for a handshake.

The tragedy of this "declining dollar value" model is that at some point, a company has nothing left to offer an employee. If the employee is already completely satisfied with their living conditions, but is concerned about other aspects of the job, such as the workload or the team, these companies would not change to satisfy the employee.

These companies only have money, but it means nothing to the person.